Last night, after a childish attempt at “getting back” at my husband, I made a rash decision to give up my Facebook account after he simply asked me how much time I spent on the site. I, being extremely overwhelmed and completely hormonal, took it as a negative aspect and basically trashed him on Facebook, doing more harm than good. This morning I awakened to all different types of responses to my post from the previous evening and I was left feeling completely embarrassed, childish, and pained at the fact that I had treated my husband like shit in one simple act of rebellion.
I took what one particular person had to say to heart. He is my husband’s best friend and probably one of the wisest people I’ve ever met. When I read that he was “disappointed”, I immediately felt my heart drop- because he was right. Not only that, but I realized in that moment just how much I respected this person and was upset at myself for letting him down.
After some thought and mentally beating myself up for a good part of the morning, I confronted my husband and told him what happened. I also told him that I still planned on deleting my Facebook account, but for more reasons than I had realized in the heat of the moment. I told him that not only was it becoming a distraction in our marriage, but it was becoming a distraction in my own well-being. I have felt for a very long time now that I am completely lonesome and that Facebook was my only outlet to the outside world. In many cases, this is true, seeing as I don’t have cable, a job, or go to school. I would get on Facebook every morning and night to catch up on the latest gossip in the world, news, or just keeping in touch with my friends and family- all things that seem harmless. But for me, it was just a downward spiral into emptiness and loneliness.
The more time I spent on Facebook, the less time I spent actually engaging in real relationships with people. It became too easy to catch up with the click of a mouse and a few typed words, and more convenient than picking up the phone to talk or make plans. Everything was done on facebook leaving no room for me to actually leave the house and become social.
Now, if you know me, you know that being social is a major part of my life. They don’t call me a social-butterfly for nothing! I love people. I love old people, funny people, weird people, and even sometimes the scary people. I get my energy from the people around me and I thrive on social interaction. So you can see how the less time I spent in the real world and the more time I spent in the technological world would only be detrimental to my character.
So, in conclusion, I made it a point that all my friends and family had my contact info and got theirs in return. I plan on making it a point to call people and talk on the phone like the good ‘ol days. I plan on writing letters to family out of town. I plan to text and even email to make arrangements for coffee dates or girls nights out.
But most of all, I plan to spend more time with the one person that means the most to me than anyone else: my husband.
Here’s to a happy marriage and great friendships. Cheers!